I’m

                                Overcome by discomfort when I’m not busy

So tired

                                Because my thoughts are frantic if I’m at rest

It hurts me

                                When days are narrow and my options, wide

The anxious way

                                I can squeeze peace through the bottleneck

I’ve hollowed for stress

                                When I breathe a meditation

It makes my brain so proud

                                I decompress on schedule

Though I tell myself to just

                                Sleep the rationed hours

Relax the alloted moment

                                Though free time scares me

Each instant passing, I feel I fail

                                Idleness aches

And I contract around empty seconds

                                The clock ticks

My lungs, my stomach, cramping with my panic

                                I can’t

Let self-reproach I’d fled know I no longer could

                                Stop.